But lately I’ve been wondering if there is anything so wrong with just being really sad. If, in fact, being really sad is the only way to ‘fix’ anything. Because pain brings us back to our most basic selves and forces us to figure out what we actually need to live. Which, it turns out, is not that much. Just a few things that you love.

Yes, the title of my blog post is actually a foreign film about a lesbian love affair gone wrong and it's so good! I know a foreign film is good if I can keep up with the subtitles without wanting to murder someone/falling asleep. But the real reason I stole the film name for this post is because yes, I am wearing blue and it goes perfectly with my hair right now but it perfectly reflects my mood. While I am battling my depression and taking it one day at a time (see post here) it's been decent - some days are better than others but this past weekend I was able to sit down with my family and really explain to them what was happening and how I planned to attack this head on and it was the most honest and refreshing conversation I've had in a long time. I stopped lying and laid everything bare and while there wasn't a dry eye in the room I have never felt lighter. It's been a very scary couple of months just talking and admitting I needed the help that being honest with my family was my last obstacle and I am so proud of myself for acknowledging that those people who love me deserve to know my struggle because when shit hits the fan I know I can call on one of them and they'll lift me up.

Here's to not letting depression win!